So this week, I acomplished a Scientology rite of passage and recieved the answers to my personality test. I had taken this test on January 3rd but now I was discovering the answers. Kiel had called me that morning from Afghanistan, and when I mentioned to him I was going to learn the results of my personality test, he answered, "Oh? So you are going to find out your depressed, huh?" (which is a reflection of the South Park episode where they take on Scientology). I laughed it off because I was honestly excited to learn the results of my test. I'm not depressed (I do suffer from anxiety attacks, though). So I dropped Loki off with Krissi and headed into DC.
So I went up to the fourth floor of the building and met again with Austin, who pulled up my results. Guess what it said? Yup. I'm fucking depressed and didn't even know it (go on all you South Park fans, have a chuckle). According to Oxford Capacity Analysis, I am depressed, easily influenced by my surroundings (that might be true), anxious (yea) and not compassionate (fucking seriously? then what would my mother and Kiel score for that?). I promise as soon as I get my car back from the VW dealership I will scan and post the actual test results page BTW. Then Austin reccomended a shit load of classes that (for a nominal fee) would help me with my problems. About 5 different classes. $50 a pop. You do the math.
Then I went down to the study room to do more studying and was greeted by She Who Constantly Blows Up My Fucking Phone. She made some snide comment about my not being by in a while. So when she asked me if I had any questions....I did. The Dianetics Book says that the reactive mind can be physically located during autopsy, but it doesn't say where it is located. What lobe of the brain is this evil horrible thing that causes people to be sad and act foolishly? So I asked her. She fumbled through her copy of Dianetics for a moment and then showed me a page that said the reactive mind was located within each cell....So each cell has a mind? What does it look like? Where are the pictures/ graphs? WHERE IS THE EVIDENCE? I understand that religion is faith and that faith must be something that is blind but if this is something that can be physically proven then prove it! She couldn't. I stayed for only half an hour and got out of there.
I was scheduled to take a Dianetics Seminar that following weekend. This was to better help me understand the book that I was being harrased to come by a study more. By this point I was just so freaking done with it. Seriously- Go to a seminar all weekend for almost 12 hours a day? Leave Loki for that long on the weekend without even the hopes of being intoxicated? So the night before (a Friday), Krissi, Nacho and I went to La Tolteca for dinner and the next night I had plans to go out with Krissi and Jessica since Jess was in town for the weekend. As we are driving to the restaurant, I get a call. It's from Jim, the man leading the seminar that weekend. He wanted to confirm I would be there and told me to make sure to get plenty of sleep and not to drink any alcohol. I said "Sure thing." And got off the phone.
Guess who had a BIG ASS MARGARITA at dinner that night? This girl right here.
When I got home that night, I went into the Moms' room and talked to them about this. "Mom....I really don't want to go to this seminar. I don't feel like I'm getting anything out of this."
"Then why are you going?"
".....my journey, I guess."
"Krys, if you know that this isn't for you, then you know it isn't for you. Would a seminar make that big of a difference?"
As I laid in bed that night, playing around on my laptop, listening to Loki's lullabies over his baby monitor, I came across a very disturbing website with even more disturbing articles. This website contained a Penthouse 1983 article with L. Ron Hubbard Jr. that really disturbed me (talks of abortion obsessions, drugs, money, beatings, blackmail, Satanism) and then there was a similar article from a Paulette Cooper who wrote "The Scandal Behind Scientology," in 1968 and was sued, harrassed and slandered (allegedly) by the church for 15 years.
Guess who didn't go to the seminar?
Guess who still gets calls from Scientologists?
Guess who is so not a Scientologist?
THIS GIRL RIGHT HERE!
Now on to being Hindu.
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