My first week as a Scientologist

I'm still not very sure how I feel about Scientology. The people are extremely friendly and seem to be very happy, but it seems to be a religion void of the spiritual aspects of other religions. I was there for three hours on Monday and all that was discussed was my mind. So lemme tell ya about that:

Holy shit that was a rough morning. Loki and I have been fighting off a cold and it really started to hit Loki that morning. He was fussy and stuffy and part of me thought I was simply going to have to leave him on the side of the road and cut my losses.So then I had to google where I hell I was going because I really don't spend a lot of time in Dupont Circle so I don't know that neighborhood as well as I know others. That's when I found out that the Church of Scientology in D.C. was THE FIRST Scientology church. And that L. Ron Hubbard actually lived in the house that was later converted into the first Scientology Church for a few years.

Anywho, so I load Loki up into the car with his stroller and all of his necessities while he is screaming at me from his car seat (and in my mind I was cursing my friends who weren't able to go with me: "Fuck your back, Krissi!!!!" "Fuck your furnace, Nacho!!!!"). Thankfully the traffic on 210/295/395 didn't suck and I found myself at 1826 R Street, NW in about 20 minutes. I was lucky enough to get a spot practically in front of the center, so I paid the meter, got Loki situated in his stroller and walked across the street to start my journey.

Well, no one ever said that finding yourself was a smooth journey, but WHAT THE FUCK!?  No handicap access so I was pulling Loki's stroller up the front stairs. Not easy! But when we reached the top, I smoothed my jacket, fixed my hair and reached for the door. Except the fucking door knob wouldn't budge! I saw a white piece of paper on the door. Apparently THIS Scientology Center is being converted into a historical site/ mueseum and there is a NEW Scientologfy Center/ Church on 16th st (about 2 miles aways). "Fuck fuck fuck," I cursed as I then had to get Loki's stroller back down those front stairs (oh and a shout out to that douche bag who walked by, looked at us and didn't offer to help; you are a class act, butt hole!). So I loaded us back into the car, folded up the stroller, cursed again as I saw that I still have 1:50 left on the parking meter and made our way over to 16th st. (sick baby+ me already uber pissed off + it was fucking cold out= yes I did drive two miles).

So then we pulled up to the NEW Scientology Church. I found a parking space (Fuck! The meter! I used all my change on the OTHER meter. Oh well give me a ticket!). Unloaded Loki and got him situated in his stroller and we started back on my journey again...

EXCEPT....this church wasn't very handicap friendly either. There were only a few steps out front but a shit load of them inside and I could totally see myself eating shit on those pretty marble stairs and either myself or Loki taking a trip to the ER. So...... back to the car. I got Loki out of his stroller and put his stroller back in the car and decided to justy hold him the entire time.

So the inside of the Scientology Church was very beautiful. Marble and hardwood floors and beautiful molding that gave it a feel like I was walking around someone's house. There was a display that took up most of the lobby, sort of a walking display that covered different aspects of Scientology. The first display highlighted L. Ron Hubbard with other displays discussing Dianetics, the growth of Scientology from Dianetics into a religion and various community programs. A nice woman came out to talk to me, named Nikki (name changed of course, there is that rumor that Scientologists are quick to sue and I'm not getting sued for unlawfuilly using someone's name). Being that I couldn't just say, "Hey I'm on a quest to find God! Let's go look for him/her!" I told her that I was interested in Scientology and that I was currently trying to get through the latest edition of Dianetics but was finding it to be a very difficult read. This woman was so friendly! She set Loki and I up in a private viewing room (and brought in toys for Loki to play) so I could watch a supplemental DVD about Dianetics. 

Ok so...while the DVD seemed to make assumptions that seemed to be plasuble (how our life experiences and the trauma we have dealt with can sabotage us from happiness later in life)...there were some parts that just seemed to jump out at me and make me think, could this really be true? There were a few times when it talked about how psychology and psychiatry are ineffective and basically wrong (which made me think of when Tom Cruise told Brooke Shields that she should've simply exercised to cure her post partum depression instead of taking her meds.....HAHAHAHAHA Shut the hell up!). But then it was when the DVD discussed how many of the engrams we carry (past painful experiences that are recorded in the reactive center of our brains) are given to us before we become 2 years old, with many of them being while we are still in the womb. I'm not saying that it isn't possible...but from what I have learned, it simply doesn't seem plausible. A baby can hear by a certain age and their cognitive skills are usually some of the last to develop, for the most part babies in the wombs simply react so how would Loki be "knocked out," if I had hit my stomach on the counter and then been able to record what I was saying and be able to comprehend it all subconsciously later in his life? I'm still very skeptical, but I'm trying to keep myself open to all of this. And where is the Supreme Being in all of this? There was so much discussion about my mind and my past and my experiences and paying $20 for the DVD I was watching (I didn't, BTW, Kiel threw enough of a bitch fit when I told him that I had bought books about it) that I don't see the religion aspect of Scientology yet, but it has only been a week.

So tomorrow I go in for my first auditing session. I'm curious to see if it works and I'm also scared that it will work. Christianity boasts the power of confession, but it also boasts that some times the best thing for a woman to do is to "silently bear her cross." Not to say I'm some martyr or that my life hasn't been freaking sweet (it has, just so you know!) but I have had bumps along the way and I don't know if I can really open myself up to some stranger who wouldn't even be able to offer me a xanax afterwards to deal with whatever wounds I would be re-opening. But who knows, maybe it will make me even happier.

Oh and I didn't get a parking ticket.